Replies: 59
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All-In [48195]
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Morbid, but could happen to boomers and youngsters at any time.
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:06 AM
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Have you thought about where you want to be buried or cremated/spread?
I'm thinking cremation, spread out on Death Valley (appropriate).
Please get the boomer jokes out the way 1st FTR henry, zettner, bengaline, Father G® are older than me.
Have me by a few years, prolly a few more.
BTW - I prefer to be 6' up than 6'down.
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Heisman Winner [137495]
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All-In [43986]
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Serial killer style
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:11 AM
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Wrap me in a sheet, no embalming, no casket, bury me in the wilderness. Or, plant me in a garden. I bet I would grow a delicious tomato.
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CU Medallion [56075]
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Biodegradable would be my choice. As would be a full service church funeral with
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:24 AM
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Jesus and the Resurrection preached.
Been to a couple of secular celebrations of life and I’m sorry, it is not the same.
That said, funerals are for the living. I won’t know about it.
Doeth with my mortal remains what thou wilt.
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All-In [27806]
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All-In [27806]
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For the longest time I was very anti-cremation. I forget the reasons.
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:45 AM
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I think maybe I didn't want my ashes to get mixed in with other people's or something. But I hate the idea of me taking up space for nothing more than a plot nobody will visit. It's useless.
Now the question is where I want to go. I figure if I go first, keep me in a container until I can get slipped into my wife's coffin. Or dump me in the Atlantic, somewhere just out from the Gay Dolpin.
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CU Medallion [60454]
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TIL Jimmy is FBCoach***
Apr 23, 2024, 9:11 AM
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All-In [27806]
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If FBCoach is a middle school art teacher
Apr 23, 2024, 9:40 AM
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who likes to scissor.
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Oculus Spirit [81718]
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Its possible***
Apr 23, 2024, 10:21 AM
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Heisman Winner [106546]
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My family knows the rules. Cremate me, spread me in the Rockies and in
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:52 AM
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the Atlantic.
Similar to what we did (are going to do) with Mom. Dad was against cremation, so he is in the ground in a gravesite that none of us have visited in a while. It has been a couple years since I have probably been there, maybe when Mom died.
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Heisman Winner [106546]
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Oculus Spirit [76738]
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Heisman Winner [106546]
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Heisman Winner [136238]
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For years I've told my wife that I wanted a Viking funeral.
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:54 AM
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Just put me on a little wooden barge and push me off into Lake Wylie, and then she can stand in our front yard and fire flaming arrows into it. But then I read about Lemmy's ashes being kept in an urn at his favorite watering hole, the Rainbow Bar & Grill on the Sunset Strip and thought how great it would be to reside on a shelf at The Thirsty Beaver for eternity. If you've ever been inside you'd know that I sure wouldn't look out of place in there, LOL.
So...I haven't actually decided yet.
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All-In [27806]
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When my beta fish died, we gave it a viking funeral at the reflection pond.
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:56 AM
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Lot o points [156690]
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You were like the fun, creative nerd.***
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:41 AM
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All-In [27806]
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Prior to the funeral we were mixing pixie sticks with vodka to see how that
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:47 AM
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would go.
How it went was a viking funeral for a beta fish.
It was also disgusting.
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Lot o points [156690]
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Closest I got to that was funneling
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Apr 23, 2024, 10:02 AM
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A bottle of Boone’s in Johnstone when about 10 guys put $5 each in the kitty.
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All-In [27806]
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Kitty got a number?***
Apr 23, 2024, 11:05 AM
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Lot o points [156690]
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My fam already knows.
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Apr 23, 2024, 8:56 AM
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Cremated, ashes scattered in the Chattooga at Bull Sluice.
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Oculus Spirit [81718]
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We have a family plot.
Apr 23, 2024, 9:06 AM
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But I'd rather be cremated and spread at the jetties, or put in a reef and dumped offshore in the Bahamas.
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All-TigerNet [12775]
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Re: Morbid, but could happen to boomers and youngsters at any time.
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:16 AM
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If I get clearance from the Clemson Administration, I wish to be strapped to the Oculus, to be known as the Tower of Unsilence, and be consumed by the vultures of Pickens and Oconee counties.
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All-In [27806]
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I can't imagine what IPTAY would charge you for that.***
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:17 AM
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All-TigerNet [12775]
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IPTAY Death Donor
Apr 23, 2024, 9:24 AM
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Some have it all.
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All-TigerNet [12775]
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Re: IPTAY Death Donor
Apr 23, 2024, 9:25 AM
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Gave
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110%er [7090]
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Oculus Spirit [81718]
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I think I may leave everything to Clemson.
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:13 AM
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Let them fight the creditors in an epic winner takes all financial battle for the scraps of my estate.
WTH will Clemson do with a 20 year old bay boat and some out of style Costa sunglasses?
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CU Medallion [56412]
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No wake for me, please.
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:33 AM
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Been to a couple of these lately and they do not appeal. My grandparents had the right idea: They donated their bodies to science and then were cremated. They said we could have a memorial if we want, but they didn't want anything to do with it. Those things are for the living, after all.
Also, ashes are just pulverized bone. I'd rather they keep my skeleton intact and roll it out every Halloween. Get as much mileage as we can outta this bad boy.
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Lot o points [156690]
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Are they pulverized
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:44 AM
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I had no idea about any of it until I read an article lately that there was some lawsuit somewhere because there was mostly no bones in the ashes because the temps aren’t high enough to incinerate them, so they just leave them out.
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All-In [27806]
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We can't do anything right in this country anymore.***
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:45 AM
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CU Medallion [56412]
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Lot o points [156690]
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Sorry, I wasnt clear. I wasnt disputing you,
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Apr 23, 2024, 10:09 AM
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Just wondering how many funeral homes skip that step and run the ashes through a sieve and toss the rest. It was what I’d read about.
I’d like to be cremated but would be disappointed if my ashes are floating the Chattooga River and my femur is in a landfill in Enoree.
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Oculus Spirit [81718]
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The good part is you'll never know***
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:11 AM
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Lot o points [181763]
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Your ashes will kill the grass.***
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:46 AM
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All-In [43986]
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OK. New plan. Spread my ashes in the shape of dikbutt at midfield.***
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:51 AM
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All-In [28731]
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this means mclovin will need to be involved
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Apr 23, 2024, 10:01 AM
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Oculus Spirit [79617]
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I want to be taxidermied( I guess that's how you say it?) and put in the
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Apr 23, 2024, 9:58 AM
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captains seat of my boat. Ideally I will build a building to be stored in so I and my boat don't become weathered by the elements, and can remain in a climate controlled environment. Koe Wetzel will be playing quietly in the background, and a large refrigerator fully stocked with Coors/Keystone light will be on site.
A family friend recently passed from cancer, one of his friends loaded his ashes into fireworks and shot them over Charleston Harbor. I thought that was pretty creative, and very fitting send off for that particular individual.
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All-In [27806]
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Was he a chinaman?***
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Apr 23, 2024, 10:52 AM
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All-In [43986]
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Re: Was he a chinaman?***
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Apr 23, 2024, 10:54 AM
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Oculus Spirit [79617]
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No, and he might haunt you now for asking***
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:23 AM
[ in reply to Was he a chinaman?*** ] |
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All-In [27806]
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Joke's on him.
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Apr 23, 2024, 12:27 PM
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All of my cokes are sealed.
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Heisman Winner [106546]
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This is a really good joke
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Apr 23, 2024, 12:49 PM
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+1 for you
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All-TigerNet [11299]
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Oculus Spirit [75996]
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Whatever is cheapest.***
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Apr 23, 2024, 10:06 AM
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All-In [31930]
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Is there a Ralphs nearby?***
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:15 AM
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Oculus Spirit [81718]
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I 'memba when my father died, the funeral home got ahold of my mother
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:18 AM
[ in reply to Whatever is cheapest.*** ] |
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and she ended up burying my dad in some ridiculous over the top casket.
I overheard later her telling my sister "I think that's what he would have wanted".
I never said anything to my mother about it, but at the time I looked at my brother and said "is she joking?" Dad was so cheap he would have preferred paper over plastic for a wrap and some duct tape."
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All-TigerNet [12306]
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All-In [31930]
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We consecrate your remains to the bussom of the Pacific Ocean
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:14 AM
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All-In [42597]
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Does Clemson charge a premium for where I get scattered in Death Valley?
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:23 AM
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Like, do I have to have certain amount of IPTAY points and giving levels to get on the field? Or will my wife have to sprinkle me UDP style in the upper North stands?
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Oculus Spirit [81718]
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They'll spread you all over the hill
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Apr 23, 2024, 11:28 AM
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So you can be covered with freshman vomit for all eternity
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All-In [27806]
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Coed butt sweat.***
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Apr 23, 2024, 12:28 PM
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All-In [48475]
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That ain't butt sweat.******
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Apr 23, 2024, 12:35 PM
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All-In [27806]
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Your vastly overestimate my inclination to differentiate.
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Apr 23, 2024, 12:40 PM
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female fluids are female fluids.
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All-In [30058]
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All-In [31930]
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^^^ hehehehe he means his ejaculate***
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Apr 23, 2024, 12:43 PM
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Orange Blooded [3779]
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Bobby Knight
Apr 23, 2024, 12:48 PM
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Give me the Bobby Knight burial
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All-In [47011]
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Same way I lived my life. Absolute cheapest way possible.
Apr 23, 2024, 1:59 PM
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I don't care what they do to me. We have a family plot but I really don't care.
Wife of says she is going to get me stuffed on hard.
Funeral home said they could give us a discount on the cotton if we go that route.
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All-In [30537]
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As Glen Campbell said in "True Grit"
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Apr 25, 2024, 2:25 PM
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I ain't dead yet!
You know, I really haven't given it much thought. But I guess I better soon. Both of my parents were cremated and sitting in pretty wooden boxes at my sister's house. Some nights you can still hear them a fussin'! lol
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Oculus Spirit [94332]
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One of my daughters asked if she could bury her mother's ashes with me.
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Apr 26, 2024, 5:27 AM
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I told her ok but don't put a cell phone in the casket so she can't call the law on me again.
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Oculus Spirit [94332]
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I do not care what happens to this body when I'm done with it.
Apr 26, 2024, 5:24 AM
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I'm wearing it completely and absolutely out then I'm shedding it for a new one. If you want it free of charge let me know.
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